...if you find yourself looking at your watch 6 or 7 times in a row and still don't know what time it is.
...if you read a poster on "Back pain" as "Blancpain"
...if you spend more time switching straps than wearing the watch.
...if you own more watches than hours in a day.
...if when you look in a mirror, you look at your watch before you look at your face.
...if you get to the end of your driveway, then go back in the house to change watches.
...if you inconspicuously pull your sleeve up to reveal your watch when meeting someone new.
...if even at K-Mart, you check out the watches.
...if you rationalize your latest watch purchase with astrology.
...if you spell relief R.O.L.E.X.
...if you use your chronograph for...
- timing a raindrop running down your window.
- timing the walk to the corner store.
- timing how long it takes for your dog to "come" from across the park. Then trying to work that out in miles per hour.
- timing a 15 minute nap.
...if your watch cost more than your car.
...if you look at your watch ten times before you see what time it is.
...if a beautiful woman walks into the room, and you look at her companion's watch.
...if people in the office are afraid to ask you the time, because it will take you ten minutes to finish telling them.
...if you spend longer winding your watches than brushing your teeth each morning.
...if you are reading this post and feeling guilty.
...if you check 3T forum before your e-mail at work each morning.
...if a key purchase decision is how to hide it from your wife.
...if know the meaning of 7750, 5100, 8926, 3706, 2893, 5513, 992, etc.
...if you have a separate watch for each day of the week, and another one for evenings.
...if the only German you can pronounce correctly is "A. Langay unt Zohnay".
...if your wife gives you grief for strapping your automatics to the grandson's legs because you can't afford an automatic winder.
...if the jewelry rider on your homeowner's insurance costs more than the policy on the house.
...if you know what time advertising directors set watches to before photographing them for an add - and why.
...if you remember when a Heuer chronograph cost $79.95 from an add in the back of Road & Track (and still kick yourself for not buying one then).
...if you go in a watch store to browse and end up teaching the salespeople how to set and operate all the chronographs.
...if every watch and clock in your house is always within 5 seconds of WWV.
...if you know all the Swiss Cantons but not the capital of USA.
...if your pets have names like El Primero, Valjoux, and Lemania..
...if your children are named Patti & Phillipe.
...if you think the Magna Carta was signed at a quarter past twelve, and not 1215AD.
...if you believe that Charles I was beheaded at 4:49 in the afternoon.
...if you think that World War II ended at a quarter to eight in the evening.
...if you remove your JLC Master in a pub, puts it face down on a (new) beer mat, and shows off the Master Control seal on the back.
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